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  • Writer's pictureJacht

Imperfectly Me

By: Blake Krenk

All I remember doing as a child was looking forward to the future. From the time I could walk, I was already thinking about where I wanted to live and what I wanted to do. I had goals and desires, and I knew I was the only person that could achieve them. Looking back, it amazes me thinking how my family must of thought looking at this little kid already wanting to grow up and be on his own. Naively every year for Christmas, I would ask my parents for my own apartment so I could have my own space and begin my life. My family laughed, seeing it as a joke, but I was determined to take control of my own life and fight for what I wanted.

As a young adolescent, the future seemed so exhilarating. New experiences, faces, and opportunities brought excitement. But as soon as responsibility hit and the young, eager teenager began to face real challenges, the future started to seem like a devastating nightmare. Would I pass all of my college classes? Would I find that potential, influential internship? Would I even know what to do after graduation? There were all questions I could not answer. I was so busy planning my perfect life, I forgot to calculate all the time and effort it would take to get there. All of my time and energy was focused on looking forward, and I was blinded by the huge monumental moments.

But these moments were really preparing me. College takes a lot of growth, time, determination and, of course, work. No one can float through college (but if you can please call me because I would like that answer key.) Going to college is the groundwork that helps you prepare for your future. Instead of stressing and worrying about things I couldn’t control, I started to put my energy into the work I was already doing. It took me a while to force myself to live in the moment and concentrate on what my day-to-day tasks were and stop worrying about the events that were yet to come. It’s mind boggling to me that society expects us to know “what we want to be when we grow up” at such a young age. It’s okay to take your time and go at your own pace. We have the rest of our lives to worry about the future. We will never get these years back, so I want to start enjoying them before it’s too late.

As graduation slowing creeps ahead, I have finally found some of the answers to my problems. This self-realization took me a lot of sleepless nights, lo of ibuprofen and, of course, time. I still do not have all of the answers but that’s what adulthood is all about. Making horrible mistakes is inevitable, but I am hopeful that I will have enough confidence to rise above to face challenges head-on. I will never stop planning my future. It’s exciting and terrifying, but it’s a part of life. There will always be that inner trait that wants to strive for greatness. I think that shows passion and a desire to make a difference. Right now, I am happy to be right where I am, looking ahead with bright eyes, ready to step into the ring of fire we call life.


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